France

Posted on by under travel

So, tomorrow I’m off travelling! Heading to France for a few days, to visit a friend in Aix en Provence and it’s the first time ever I’m flying somewhere on my own. So if this blog is suddenly and mysteriously abandoned, I’ve probably crashed, been kidnapped, stepped on the wrong plane or something else along those lines. Just giving you a heads up. Image

Seriously though, look at this place!? I’m there to visit my friend, but her living in a beautiful french town is quite a bonus. And I love travelling, especially going places on my own, it’s terrifying and exhilarating how everything depends on me and I feel like it’s a test, a shot at seeing how it is to walk the earth alone. Not belonging anywhere except for on the ground I stand on in that second. And then there’s the contrast of going to visit someone, where you suddenly put all your trust in that person, who’s the only one who actually knows the language and the people there. Trust her to take care of everything. And we’re gonna have the best of times. Image

Runner

Posted on by under poetry

You told me how I always fell in love with cars and not with houses, looked at a backpack with a smile but at a bookshelf with an aching heart. I was always going. I’m a runner and a poet, life pulls me in different directions. Keeps me going and makes my heart want to stay with what I find. I can look out the window of a bus and get the sudden urging need to remember every tree I see, to sit down under every single one and have picnic and the best day of my life. You don’t have to go far, and we don’t have to run, but I have to keep moving so that as many things as possible in this universe get the attention they deserve.

Dancing

Posted on by under life

I’ve gotten a job as a dance teacher! It makes me jump out of happiness and stress out about the lessons I have to plan. But I’m happy, most of all I’m happy, so many people are on the lookout for jobs and I got one without even putting effort into looking, bonus that I get paid for something I’d probably do for free. Terrifies me though because I’ve got no idea what you can expect from different age groups? Guess I’ll figure it out.

Do you guys ever wish you were clearly defined by one of your hobbies? I wish I was a star dancer or famous artist or known writer, instead of just liking a little of each. Wish I’d started something when I was really young and then never quitted it. Have to remind myself of that every time I want to quit on of the hobbies I have now.

The best 3 TV-shows ever

Posted on by under life

1. Doctor Who. Having had it’s 50-years anniversary last year, it’s the longest running and most successful science fiction show in history. Amazing, beautiful and heartbreaking. You’ll love it if you’re a sucker for beautiful sceneries, creatively thought out cultures and the most beautiful quotes.

2. Sherlock Holmes. If you have not seen BBC’s modern day version of the classic, you’re missing out. Whoever you are, whatever you do, you’re missing out. It’s smart, unbelievably clever. Entertaining, funny, dramatic, anything you could ever wish for. An episode is 90 minutes long and more well-produced than a lot of movies. If you do not love it, the fault does not lie in the show.

3. Supernatural. This is different, because unlike Doctor Who and Sherlock I can’t objectively say that it’s one of the best. Man, sometimes I don’t even know if it’s good, I just know that I love it. It’s the type of show that effortlessly drags you in, and you fall for it, completely, without really knowing why, it just has… something.

Aside

Art can be born out of other things than pain. Yes, how beautiful is not the art of the broken-hearted? I heard someone say once that sad was happy, for deep people, and the problem with pain has always been in its ability to seduce that far overrides the one of happiness. Bittersweetness is the most beautiful feeling I know.

I’m trying to teach myself, trying to learn how you find your source of creativity in light instead. Because I’m starting to realize that the seduction of pain doesn’t mean it’s more satisfactory, it just means that it’s easier. But it’s also weak, and usually selfish, whether we choose to see that side of it or not. I’m trying to choose happiness.

Aside

Why do I keep doing things I do not want to do? Why do we all keep on doing things that make us unhappy? It bothers me, bothers me so much, all the things we do for the wrong reasons and all the things we turn to because of fear or anger or despair. Please don’t be the type of person that lets his or her life slowly drip away without anything really happening, because you spend to much time doing things that are not the best or brightest or most alive things you could spend you life doing. Don’t be the type of person that chooses career based on money, money so that you’re sure to survive and sure to be able to spend more time doing things you don’t actually want. If you’re passionate about it, it will show. Things will sort themselves out, you’ll be happy as long as you kick your fear in the ass and go for it. And please don’t be the type of person that goes for the guy or girl that just likes you. That goes for a person who is enough, who is okay and in your league. I hate seeing my friends settle for anything less than someone who makes your stomach flutter and treats you the way you should be treated. That loves you more than life and most of all someone that you would choose over everyone else in the world, over any artist or movie star, even if you were to be given a chance to get one of those. I want you to have a love story worthy of a nobelprize-winning novel. And I want you to stop doing things that do not bring you forward. I’m not gonna tell you to turn of your computer, but while you’re here, do something that’s worth your while. (so, lol, I’m pretty much telling you to get off this blog)

Happy by night

Posted on by under notes

I don’t even like the things that I like. By night I live, by night I grow and create and awaken, yet at night I fall. Deeper and deeper into myself since there’s no one else around to catch me. I love the freedom but hate that I’m not strong enough to handle it. Thank God I don’t have to do it on my own anyway. Because I want to stand up against thoughts that crowd my brain when the lights go out after having waited hours for me to let my guard down. I do not want to be afraid of the dark but I do not want to be in love with it either. Please, let me be happy by night.